Not again!
Another nasty statement, I said under my voice. There was no attempt whatsoever to say what I had done wrong only negative and hurtful remarks.
My mood was downed. I struggled to come to terms with what my critic was thinking.
I spoke to my hubby and shared my hurt. Thankfully, as we talked the issue over, he directed my heart back to the scriptures.
There is so much encouragement from God’s Word.
If you have faced harsh criticism before, you will understand how emotionally draining it is. I did not know how to respond caught between shoving the remark aside or to hit back in my defence *more likely*.
When correction is given with intent of guiding a
person in the right is *positive criticism*, a wise Christian
would receive it gladly and make amends quickly. It is pride and
foolishness to reject a Godly advice.
person in the right is *positive criticism*, a wise Christian
would receive it gladly and make amends quickly. It is pride and
foolishness to reject a Godly advice.
For References read: Psalm 141:5, Proverbs
10:17, Proverbs 28:23
10:17, Proverbs 28:23
On the other hand, a negative criticism is a deliberate attack or a
malicious hit on someone in order to cause an emotional, social and otherwise
harm to that person.
malicious hit on someone in order to cause an emotional, social and otherwise
harm to that person.
It is not a new thing to have people slander someone for no rightful cause other than mischief!
Let’s say it is pure human nature to seek fault,
point fingers and accuse others of wrong doing whether or not they actually
are.
point fingers and accuse others of wrong doing whether or not they actually
are.
Which brings us back to crux of this discussion, “How should I
handle negative criticism as a Christian?”
handle negative criticism as a Christian?”
Please study the Book of Daniel.
Bible Reading: Daniel 6 (click to read on-line)
The king’s delight in Daniel sparked up envy so
much so that the other governors began to seek fault and errors in his ways.
much so that the other governors began to seek fault and errors in his ways.
Then the commissioners
and satraps began trying to find a ground of accusation against Daniel
in regard to government affairs; but they could find no ground of accusation or
evidence of corruption, inasmuch as he was faithful, and no negligence or
corruption was to be found in him. Daniel
6:4
and satraps began trying to find a ground of accusation against Daniel
in regard to government affairs; but they could find no ground of accusation or
evidence of corruption, inasmuch as he was faithful, and no negligence or
corruption was to be found in him. Daniel
6:4
1) As you move ahead in
life, you will inevitably get under some people’s skin.
life, you will inevitably get under some people’s skin.
Will there be negative bashes?
Yes, as long as you go forward, expect them.
But I like what Daniel did. You can go over the
scripture again and do a closer study.
scripture again and do a closer study.
You will agree with me that Daniel knew these men
were after him. He had a choice to hit them back, possibly go to the king and
lament over these jealous streaks.
were after him. He had a choice to hit them back, possibly go to the king and
lament over these jealous streaks.
But he chose to ignore them because they were
baseless accusations.
baseless accusations.
Don’t forget there must be proven grounds for any accusation to be considered legitimate.
2) There is nothing you can do to please
people who deliberately pick fights and never see anything good in what you are
doing.
people who deliberately pick fights and never see anything good in what you are
doing.
Stop trying to please your
naysayers.
naysayers.
He flung his windows open as always to pray the
Lord. He went about his daily business.
Lord. He went about his daily business.
If there is something to learn from your critic, pick it up, learn it and move ahead.
If there is nothing move ahead all the same ignoring the distraction and noise of negative criticism.
3) Choose to react differently: Daniel did not chase after these men, or sob
half way through the night. Not that they didn’t get to him, but he chose to
react differently. We own our reactions and responses.
half way through the night. Not that they didn’t get to him, but he chose to
react differently. We own our reactions and responses.
Our reactions to
negative remarks are purely our choice.
negative remarks are purely our choice.
Daniel sought God’s face instead. He desired more than ever to please God and
not his accusers.
not his accusers.
When a man’s ways please the LORD, he
maketh even his enemies to be at peace with him.
maketh even his enemies to be at peace with him.
Proverbs 16:7
4) Choose God’s approval.Make sure the Lord is in what you are doing. Examine your life and actions and see if you are in faith. Otherwise make amends.
Ultimate
approval from God surpasses commendation from men.
For not he that commendeth himself is
approved, but whom the Lord commendeth.
approved, but whom the Lord commendeth.
2Corinthians 10:18
This brings us to lesson five:
5) Allow
God do your fights. You can’t do them. I tried once to do it myself but I made the situation worse!
God do your fights. You can’t do them. I tried once to do it myself but I made the situation worse!
How could Daniel go up against these
men who had been conspiring to take him down? They knew the right words to rope him in because they
had been brainstorming on Daniel’s case.
men who had been conspiring to take him down? They knew the right words to rope him in because they
had been brainstorming on Daniel’s case.
Seeing it is a righteous thing with God to recompense tribulation to
them that trouble you; 2Thessalonians 1:6
them that trouble you; 2Thessalonians 1:6
6) Pray for
your accusers It is persecution to be falsely
accused or wrongly judged but Jesus requires us to pray for those who make it
their mission to find faults in us.
your accusers It is persecution to be falsely
accused or wrongly judged but Jesus requires us to pray for those who make it
their mission to find faults in us.
But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse
you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use
you, and persecute you; Matthew 5:44
you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use
you, and persecute you; Matthew 5:44
7) Pray for
yourself. Malicious attacks can be emotionally disturbing but the Lord is with you through this situation and many others. Don’t be discouraged to continue in good faith. Encourage yourself in prayers and in the Word.
yourself. Malicious attacks can be emotionally disturbing but the Lord is with you through this situation and many others. Don’t be discouraged to continue in good faith. Encourage yourself in prayers and in the Word.
i. Lord,
give me a teachable spirit so I can learn what I am supposed to and a gentle
spirit, so I have self control in the midst of the chaos.
give me a teachable spirit so I can learn what I am supposed to and a gentle
spirit, so I have self control in the midst of the chaos.
ii. Lord
Jesus, heal my heart of the brokenness and hurt that I feel
Jesus, heal my heart of the brokenness and hurt that I feel
The spirit of a man will sustain his
infirmity; but a wounded spirit who can bear?
infirmity; but a wounded spirit who can bear?
Proverbs 18:14
iii. Help me dear Jesus, to press on forward.
Brethren, I count not myself to have
apprehended: but this one thing
I do, forgetting those things
which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,
apprehended: but this one thing
I do, forgetting those things
which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,
Philippians 3:13
8) Speak to a friend. The rebuke of friend is better than flatteries of an enemy. Speaking to a wise friend brings your heart back to the place of the Word, through prayers and encouragement s/he will walk with you.
In summary, I made a 3 minute video to sum up our discussion. Please watch it and you are free to leave comments on YouTube if you are watching it there…
In summary, I made a 3 minute video to sum up our discussion. Please watch it and you are free to leave comments on YouTube if you are watching it there…
By His Great Grace,
Ifeoma Samuel
Side note
Dear friends, I have the habit of visiting you before I
respond here on my blog that way I can keep track of blogging friends I am yet
to visit.
I am yet cover grounds and it may take a little while but I will get to your blog and respond
here too! Thanks for your understanding and I appreciate your kindest comments
thus far☺
respond here on my blog that way I can keep track of blogging friends I am yet
to visit.
I am yet cover grounds and it may take a little while but I will get to your blog and respond
here too! Thanks for your understanding and I appreciate your kindest comments
thus far☺
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